Sunday, September 25, 2011

The Fabric of Our Lives



[thanks Hallie Lee]
What's up, box-handlers?

Ahhh it's finally Fall.
 
[thanks Ri]


I've been waiting for this.  

Sweaters.  
Scarves.  
Tall boots.

Girls in tweedy blazers.  Gusting winds.  
Being naked under down comforters.  

Suddenly needing socks. 
[viaCollectcallsfromhome]


At last, at last. 

The surly neighborhood 14-year-old boys who hang out in front of the produce store on their BMX bikes all summer long and say things like, "Hey. Hey, I'm asking you out on a date. You wanna go on a date with me, mami? Hey, you just a bitch?  That it?" when you walk by are safely locked back up in school for another year.  

Ha ha ha ha.
[thanks Krystal]

Fall!  My favorite season!  

Burning leaves and scratchy wool sweaters! 
Apple-picking! Cider! 

Pumpkin pie filling straight out of the can! 


Best of all, Fall means...young Timothy Maxwell Thumperton finally. stops. shedding.

[my bebeh bun!]


Thank you sweet christ.  
We almost didn't make it.

Fall also means lots of trips, and I just got back from a few days in San Francisco.

While I was there, Shay and I went to the Lexington, a dyke bar in the Mission.

It was, like it often is on a good night, packed with queers.
  
About a hundred girls, boys, and bois were in that tiny little space, checking each other out, shouting over the music, and pounding the $1 margarita specials just as fast as they could swallow. 

There was some serious variety in the room.  

I snapped a few pictures, trying to capture the trans kids, the red-lipsticked femmes, the natty bois, the dirty punk girls, and the fixie bike dykes in the dim red light.  

Bah.  
Too dark.  

Couldn't get a decent shot.  

I abandoned my photographic endeavors to stare dreamily at one of the bartenders, who was rocking a 50's greaser look, all slicked back, short dark hair, tight jeans rolled up to show white socks and black loafers, and a white t-shirt with cigarettes actually rolled into the sleeve-cuffs.  


She was pulling it off, too.  

Amazing.

As I gazed at her, and the sea of mos gathered around her jostling for drinks, I thought about how great it was that we were all here together, all of us so totally different, but unified by a single factor - we were all queer. 

Or...was that the only factor?

I backed up from my rosy-eyed view and took a more superficial look.  
[viaqueerbrownxx]


There was something else we all had in common.

Something...cozy.
Something...zippy.

Y'allfags, every gayelle in that bar was wearing a zip-up hoodie.

[via intricate-mindsz]


Adidas zip-ups. 

Fleecy REIs.  

Slouchy cotton hooded sweatshirts.

Every. single. mo. there.

Including me.
[thanks jraak]


I turned to Shay.

Me:  (shouting over the music) SHAY! OMG! LOOK WHAT EVERYONE'S WEARING!   

Shay:  (bellowing) WHAT?

Me: WE'RE ALL WEARING THE SAME THING! EVEN THE BOUNCER! EVEN THE BARBACK! I CAN'T BELIEVE I NEVER NOTICED!

Shay:  WHAT?

Me: 
(screaming now) THE HOODIES!  LOOK AT ALL THE HOODIES!

Shay: YEAH, I DON'T KNOW IF SHE HAS THAT PIERCED OR NOT!
[via hellogirls]


Hmm.

As it so often happens in bars, Shay and I were having two completely different conversations. 

We left the bar, and I left with zip-up hoodies on the brain. 
[via http://www.flickr.com/photos/malloreigh/]


Suddenly, I was seeing them everywhere.

How did I not see this before? 

Lesbians LOVE hoodies!
[thanks Sarah Ray Rondot]

Everywhere I went, for the rest of the trip, I saw gay-looking girls in hoodies, and straight-looking girls in light jackets.

Well, whatever. 
[via hellogirls]

I wrote it off.

It was San Francisco.  You need hoodies there - the average annual temperature is 57 degrees and clammy
(heh).  

Not cold enough for an outright jacket.  
Not warm enough for just a t-shirt.
[thanks Lauren Walton]


But when I got back to Chicago, it was like my eyes had been opened.  

I couldn't stop noticing!
[via am-photo]

Queer-looking women were rocking hoodies. 
[Micca from http://mixx1127.tumblr.com]

Straight-looking girls...weren't. 

Not nearly as much.

Let me clarify:  

hoodie, to me, is any soft, cozy outer layer worn as an ultra-casual jacket.

[thanks Iris Whitworth]

It could be a track zip-up.  
It might or might not actually have a hood.

But wow - I should have seen this. 

I should have noticed earlier.
[quee via quee-ative]

I mean, all the signs were there. 

live with a hoodie collector.  

CJ's obsessed.

Just this morning, I was watching her get ready, and I realized she was wearing a track jacket over a hooded sweatshirt.

Jesus!  
Everywhere I turned!

So...what's the deal with hoodies?

I mean, I get it.


Hoodies are soft and cozy.  
[thanks BismuthCrystals]

All people, all over the world, of every sexual orientation under the sun, love hoodies. 

Straight girls, gay girls, gay boys, everybody.  

But think about your gaymo friends!  

I have a few I can't even picture without a hoodie.
[thanks aj]


Now, I know.
I know what you're thinking.

A fucking hoodie?
Please.

Everyone has a hoodie.  
Everyone.  

Your dog has a hoodie.  

What, is your dog a lesbian, now, too?

C'mon now.
  
Don't be like that.  
Just think about it.  

Everyone loves hoodies, but...lesbians really love hoodies. 
[thanks tawnya and seven]

With an unnatural, unholy love.

Lesbians love zip-up hoodies so much that some of them wear little else.
[thanks! pillowtalkmpls]

Lesbians love them so much that lots of 'em have different levels of hoodies - house hoodies, club hoodies, work hoodies, hoodies for every possible two-degree variance in temperature.

Hoodies are warm.  Hoodies are slightly baggy.  
Hoodies are easy-access.  
[by amanda smith]

Hoodies are protective - you can flip up the hood if someone's staring at you, thoughtfully shielding their eyes from the white-hot light of your hotness.
[thanks sheena! by chinda]


Zippy hoodies have nice, deep pockets where we can put our keys and wallets and cell phones without having to wear a purse.

And...what's a girl with no purse?

How 'bout...an easy gaydar tipoff?
[thanks Alicia]

We gayelles are a casual people. 

We don't, as a group, tend towards fussiness.  
[thanks]

We're practical, and we like our comfort.


Which would explain the continuing popularity amongst dykes with this particular fucking shoe:


Stereotypically, lesbians don't like dressing up, unless we're the natty or dressy type. 

But.

Claiming the vast category of "zip-up hoodies" as queer-ish seemed a biiiiiiiit much.
[thanks Leelah R]

Sluts, I'm not saying "wearing a hoodie is gay." 


Not every girl you see wearing one is a lezzer. 

Of course not. 

I'm not saying that not wearing one means you're straight.

I'm merely saying that I see a lot of lesbians, and the ones I see are cuddled in snuggly, zippy comfort all the damn time. 

[thanks JT]

Excessive hoodie love was activating my gaydar.

Big time.

Was it just me, though?
[thanks Leelah R]

Fortunately, the scientific mind cannot be satisfied with mere hypothesis.


We have to have proof.  

More evidence than just the thousands of pictures y'all have sent me, not even realizing you're wearing zip-up hoodies in all of them.

[thanks Krystal]


So.  

It was time for a highly scientifical quiz.
  
Made up and sent to ten gay girls and ten straight girls (for control), all chosen at random from my Facebook, without any explanation of why these questions were being asked. 
[via diaphragm]

Soon we would know the truth.


THE HOODIE QUIZ:

1) It's Autumn now. If you had both a light jacket and a light hoodie/zip-up track jacket hanging next to each other by the door, which one would you grab if you were running out to get coffee?

2) Do you own more than four hoodies/track zippies of any type?

3) If yes...do you need all of them?  Interpret this in any way.

4) If you have more than a few hoodies, would you consider any one of them a "dressier" hoodie, suitable for going out?

5) True or False: I have, at least once, deliberately chosen to wear a hoodie for the day, knowing that it was too cold for just a hoodie, to avoid wearing a jacket. 

The answers came pouring in.


Almost everyone answered within a few hours!


I love bored people with office jobs. 


Sluts, all signs pointed to lesbians liking hoodies more than straight girls.


[thanks Chase]

I won't bore you with the numbers, but: 

Overwhelmingly, the queer girls owned more hoodies, wore more hoodies out, and refused to wear regular jackets specifically so they could wear their hoodie instead, even when it was way too cold.

Also, interestingly: of the six straight girls who filled out the quiz, four of them wanted to know what the hoodie quiz had to do with anything.

Of the eight gay girls who responded to the quiz, only one had a single question, and her question was, "Are you giving away hoodies?"

Do you see?  

The queer chicks knew the intrinsic importance of hoodies without having to ask!


We can't claim the hoodie as the sole property of queermosexuals, of course.

But we can use our eyes to see trends.

Cultural patterns among our people.

[thanks! pillowtalkmpls]


As we know, certain items of clothing and certain accessories can tip gaydar in a girl's favor.


If we already think a crush might be queer, let's add "a suspicious obsession with hoodies" to our already-extensive gaydar list.


Science!


Science for the win!
[thanks JT]


How'd you do on the Hoodie Quiz? 

146 comments:

  1. Yeah, this is definitely a thing. I recently had a great conversation with a fellow lovely lady lover about how hats and hoodies are the most important pieces of clothing.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Wearing a hoodie right meow :/ and 5 of my friends are in the pictures you just posted! I love that you put reader submitted pictures in your blog! Keep them coming, I love this blog :) Also, apparently, the excessive use of emoticons.

    ReplyDelete
  3. i waited over 2 weeks for your new post krista-face. i find it so boring, i am insulted. goddammitt not even a good laugh.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Oh... please don't let this be a thing. I'd rather wear a jacket any day. I can't seem to wear a hoodie without a tie. I have such gay hair, such a gay aesthetic, but I can't do the hoodie so much... I like things a little more structured.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I'm wearing a zip-up hoodie right now.

    ....Actually it's the only thing I'm wearing.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I answered yes to the first four questions, and when I got to the fifth all I could do is laugh because it was like you knew me well enough to make fun of me and I don't even know you! Awesome, seriously.

    ReplyDelete
  7. That's so strange, I went to SF on Saturday and specifically picked my outfit so I could wear a hoodie under a light jacket, and I almost never wear them because I get the lady sweats. It's really just part of the SF aesthetic. I actually want to incorporate more into my wardrobe because...um, they're cool. My coats also look super dressy and I want to avoid messing them up.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Oh God.
    Hoodie, yes, yes, yes, and true.
    I have ALWAYS had an unnatural obsession with hoodies. My mother has actually BANNED ME from buying more. So I have to buy them and sneak them into our house. Or if she finds it, convince her that I REALLY DO NEED IT MOM, HONESTLY, NO I AM NOT SELLING ANY OF THEM ARE YOU CRAZY?

    As a matter of fact, I'm wearing one right now. God I love hoodies.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Does a northface count....? If not, I have ATLEAST 20 other hoodies...

    ReplyDelete
  10. Yes, yes, yes! Overwhelmingly yes. And every girlfriend I've ever had is the same way. I only know a handful of men/straight chickeroos who would wear them instead of jackets. For the record, I live in the south. Also, this post took FOREVER to write didn't it? Haha. I'm a compulsive checker for new posts.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Well she had to write a hypothesis and then scientifically check it AND write up the results. All in less time than it took me to finish even the introductory chapter of my thesis!

    Thanks for doing the research and helping us find the gay girls!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Also wearing a zip up hoodie right now... Homoscience

    ReplyDelete
  13. Awww, I never get to be cool and fit in with these things :( I have one hoodie-ish sweatshirt (unless you're also wanting to count my hooded poncho--don't look at me like that, they're big where I live!) and about a million coats.

    ReplyDelete
  14. I love my....leather jacket. Sorry, but no hoodies here. They look okay on other women, but I wouldn't be caught dead in one. It might be an age thing (I'm 40). Hoodies take me back to the 70's...blech! Once you've lived through the 70's, you never go back! :)

    ReplyDelete
  15. So, my gf and I have 57 hoodies between us (I just counted). I don't know whether to be impressed or ashamed..

    ReplyDelete
  16. I don't own a single hoodie... like someone else said I prefer wearing more structured clothing. I do like a girl/boi in a hoodie though.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Not only am I wearing a hoodie right now, but it's the second hoodie of the morning, and it's not even 8 a.m. My girlfriend left for class and insisted the hoodie I was wearing at the time (hers) was necessary to complete her outfit. So I gave her that one and grabbed another (also hers). Maybe it's time I bought some of my own?

    ReplyDelete
  18. My current hoodie count is 9. I see one I like and have to talk myself out of buying another, that I can't justify one more hoodie...I've got dressy ones, casual ones, merino wool ones (plushhhhhh), thin ones, thick ones...so glad there is finally an explanation for this!

    ReplyDelete
  19. oh god. margarita night at the lex...

    ReplyDelete
  20. You know what this means, don't you? Effing Dykes hoodies!!!

    ReplyDelete
  21. Oh shit, I always draw myself in a hoodie. Don't let this become common knowledge! I'm not ready to be out yet :(

    ReplyDelete
  22. Hoodies are just so much more comfortable than jackets. I love them! I wouldn't wear them out to a bar though. I'm just not capable of pulling that off.

    ReplyDelete
  23. I have worn a hoodie every day of my life from mid-September to early May since ninth grade - slightly before I knew I was gay. They're like security blankets. C: But also, I have known a few girls (mostly my friends) that aren't gay and wear hoodies every day of their lives...but I'll defer to you on this one.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Call me crazy. But my favorite goin out attire. Is a hoodie of any color under my Tan leather motorcycle jacket. YAY. :) I currently have 9 clean hoodies stacked on my shelf plus a couple in the laundry.
    But the only thing is ive noticed alot of us lady lovers myself included are a fan of cardigans where im from. It gives off the kinda nerdy look that seems to be popular around here. Anyone have thoughts on cardigans. I also have about 7 of those.

    ReplyDelete
  25. I'm 44, and own at least 10 hoodies, so no, it's not an age thing. :)

    ReplyDelete
  26. I knew three people in these pictures personally, its proves there are very few lesbians in existence.

    ReplyDelete
  27. I haven't left the inside of a hoodie since 7th grade(awhile ago). There are a couple girls I know who wear hoodies as obsessively as I do, and they're straight. :/

    ReplyDelete
  28. THIS IS SO TRUE. I can't even explain how long I've been thinking this. Glad I'm not the only one who's noticed this pattern.

    ReplyDelete
  29. I'm doing very gay on the hoodie quiz :D

    ReplyDelete
  30. Do not own a single hoodie. Am I a bad queermo?

    ReplyDelete
  31. Yes, cardigans! Like a hoodie, but with buttons. If we can count cardigans in the mix, my girl and I have about 15 or so hoodies and cardigans. And we definitely don't need all of them, we just can't seem to pare it down; they're all so necessary! And I agree with the above poster, I love cardigans because it gives off the "nerdy" vibe. Also easier to wear a tie with.

    ReplyDelete
  32. Maybe I'm the exception that proves the rule? I have worn hoodies religiously since I was eleven. And I'm straight-ish. At least, I'm married to a boy. With a penis. And I definitely have "dressier" hoodies. But my husband and I enjoy checking out girls (and wearing hoodies) together. I guess it takes all types!

    ReplyDelete
  33. There's also the whole thing about hoodies making the people wearing them look like giant clits. Maybe we pick up on that subconsciously.

    ReplyDelete
  34. I own roughly 20 (no joke) hoodies of various dress and warmth and it would be a cold day in hell to find me without one. I even have those lazy days where I can't find a shirt and kick it in just a hoodie. Most of my ex girlfriends are the same way too, I can't believe I never picked up on this!

    ReplyDelete
  35. Yes. A serious lover of hoodies here. A few years ago at my place of work (a health food store), I was consulted about uniforms. My input? Hoodies. Black zipper hoodies. For EVERYONE! Rahhhhh ha ha! And so, my love of hoodies extends to semi-forcing them upon others.

    ReplyDelete
  36. Okay, I think you're onto something here.
    I mean, I have short hair, rarely wear make up, have an androgynous figure and am generally quite butch, but I don't wear hoodies.
    And people are shocked when I'm not straight.
    Could mean nothing but...

    ReplyDelete
  37. Actually, I was wondering when you were going to write about this. Yes. Lots of gay gals love the hoodies. In fact, I often wear ONLY a large oversized "house" hoodie on lazy Sundays.

    ReplyDelete
  38. I heart hoodies and also cardigans with elbow patches. Make you look intellectual and shit.

    ReplyDelete
  39. I am just discovering the gay magic of hoodies, honestly. This week I realized that it looks awesome/supa homo to wear hoodies UNDER JACKETS (esp. leather jackets) and have been wearing that combination constantly. Even though I'm boiling because leather jacket+hoodie=way too hot for my school, I am boiling in gayness so it's all OK.

    ReplyDelete
  40. cardigans.
    but that's probably because every day, without fail, even in the hottest summer, i have some sort of scarf-like thing on my neck. bandanas, shawls, woolly handmade things, silky patterned ones... they don't really go as well with hoodies. they bunch up in an irritating manner.
    also i hate when hoodies start pilling.
    mmm. scarves.
    and cardigans.

    ReplyDelete
  41. YES on the women without a purse. So incredibly true.

    Lesbians in zip-up hoodies remind me of Justin Bieber. Or perhaps Justin Bieber in a zip-up reminds me of a lesbian?

    ReplyDelete
  42. I kinda rock the skater look...and hoodies are the SHIT!! But they have to be element hoodies for me..just checked, and I have 28 element hoodies..at an average price of around $90 each, I've spent around $2520 on HOODIES!!!

    AH MY GOD KRISTA YOU ARE RIGHT, AGAIN, AS ALWAYS!!!

    However, I live in Australia so it's now Spring not Autumn, or "fall" as you call it lol so the hoodies will have to go away for a while..summer where I live gets to like 48 degrees celsius.. in fahrenheit thats 118.4 degrees - its still a bit of a cold snap though and as i speak im in my fav hoodie..but summer will be open us soon, damn :(

    ReplyDelete
  43. OMG, yes hoodies. I will not leave the house without a hoodie. It can be a hot LA summer day and I will have a thin, Urban Outfitters one slung over my arm (I have multiple colors for all outfits), or a super cold winter day and I'll have one over a thermal with a jacket over the hoodie. There have even been times (I'm ashamed to admit) that I've worn a hoodie...over a shirt that could also be defined as a hoodie!

    Not only that, but girls in hoodies is a turn on I'm KNOWN for. Put a girl in a hoodie (especially a sporty one) and I'm smitten. Girls in hoodies are my JAM. Even in the bedroom. I think a few people just realized who I am right now. The shame.

    Did I mention I like hoodies?

    ReplyDelete
  44. I hate hoodies with a fiery passion. They're mildly distressing on other people; the idea of wearing one is repulsive to me.

    ReplyDelete
  45. I actually haven't even owned a regular jacket since my junior high letterman, until last year when I bought a Member's Only jacket off of eBay. I do have different hoodies for different occasions/moods/level of awakeness.

    I was actually thinking just yesterday that I need to get a new one from the university bookstore...

    ReplyDelete
  46. Also, on days when it's super way too cold for a hoodie, I have been known to actually wear multiple hoodies instead of a jacket. I think I wore three (or was it four?) of various sizes at once on the day it snowed in high school.

    ReplyDelete
  47. Mmm, cardigans. I own (or steal from roommies) approximately 10 hoodies and 6 hoodless zip-ups. If I had both in front of me I would layer the hoodie under my light jacket! Fall fashion is my favourite; layers, boots, scarves, etc. Hoods are great for skipping the umbrella on rainy days too. It's amazing how many gayelles I can think of that I specifically associate with their hoodies. Mwah Krista!

    ReplyDelete
  48. Yes Krista,
    I own many many hoodies. in every colour.
    looking at pictures and realizing all my gay friends and i are always wearing hoodies and yes, usually zip ups.
    my black american apparel zip up is the "formal" one. I'll wear it over a dress shirt and under a blazer even though it's completely unnecessary.
    Why? I have no idea. because my outfit feels incomplete without a hoodie i guess.

    ReplyDelete
  49. This is awesome.
    Even as I began reading this entry I still hadn't realised that in the photo I had sent in of myself, I was wearing a hoodie. And then it pops up BAM!
    All so very, very true and interesting.
    Also, American Apparel hoodies are so great that I get them mailed to Australia.

    ReplyDelete
  50. my girlfriend just left the house wearing a t shirt and a hoodie even tho it is waaayyyy too fudgin cold ou there....

    ReplyDelete
  51. Oh my gosh, I have a serious hoodie thing.

    I, throughout all the years I have been dressing myself, have had one SPECIAL hoodie that I wore with everygoddamnthing. You can see it in the photographic record of my life.

    And I will for sure wear a hoodie when it's a little too warm or too cold for it. And if it's too cold for my hoodie, I wear my leather jacket, which is like a hoodie on the inside and even has a soft, hoodie-material hood on it.

    It's like you know me sometimes, Krista...

    ReplyDelete
  52. I just did some science to my closet, looks like I fit the pattern.

    ReplyDelete
  53. am i the only other person who's picked up on this????? i love hoodies! most of my clothes have a hood and i cannot stay away from clothing with hoods. i must be an easy target for clothing companies. want me to buy something? put a hood on it. must. have. hood.

    ReplyDelete
  54. Hoodies rock! that's why I have them from thin, sleeveless for warm times and insanely thick thermal hoodies to avoid jackets when temperature drops. And most dykes looks soooo f***king adorable in hoodies, too

    ReplyDelete
  55. Waaaah!
    I never realised this was a gay thing, how stupid of me ... I owned nothing but hoodies (and one WW2 trench coat) before I even knew I was gay. Although I must say that hoodies are pretty popular everyday in New Zealand, where I come from, but only as casual wear. (This is helped by the fact that most schools in NZ give you a sport-style hoodie when you graduate. I dunno if this is a thing in the US). BUT, you would never see someone in a bar or a club in a hoodie, unless they were queer. I myself have worn hoodies to bars and clubs on numerous occassions. They're just so convenient! Also I never EVER carry a purse, I don't own one ... only messenger bags (blushes at gayness). So really it scientifically makes sense: gay girl - purse + need to carry things = hoodie!
    I mean we are making broad generalisations here, but as Krista has said, that's what gets us laid =P
    P.S. Here is some more science: Krista + more writing = happy Emma.

    ReplyDelete
  56. Hoodies ftw! With every entry you post I am loving your blog more and more, haha.

    ReplyDelete
  57. Is that Ellis in the thumbs-up picture?!
    So cute.
    http://www.ellis-music.com/news/

    ReplyDelete
  58. In my town EVERYONE wears plaid and hoodies so it's not realy a gay thing around here. But the gays do wear certain styles of hoodies, normally ones without a big Aeropostale logo on the front XD

    The other day it was picture day and a snooty grade nine who I used to dance with came up to me and looked me up and down. (She was dressed like a fucking secretary btw) She says to me, while pointing at my hoodie "you're wearing THAT for picture day!?"... "um, yah.", "Ugh, THAT ratty old sweater!"
    Believe me, I have never been more insulted in my LIFE.
    Dumb bitch.

    I do love my hoodie!
    I own four of them. I only wear one at a time generally. The only time I normally buy a new one is when the old one gets too many holes and paint stains XD
    My current hoodie is a faded red :)

    ReplyDelete
  59. Well reading this i thought "maybe it's an american lezzie's thing?" > i don't wear hoodies nor do i own one, although i used to some years ago -right when i "was not" gay yet (haha, yeah, right). I find hoodies ok, but prefer classier jackets / sweaters / etc. My girlfriend wears a kid's jacket that looks as if she had a hoodie under. But... No, french lez girls don't seem to have such an addiction... The ones i know at least..? Are there any other frenchies here? What do you think?

    ReplyDelete
  60. My hoodie is quintessential to my daily existence. I'm a professional engineer and I wear my hoodie in the office almost every day. Hey! It gets chilly in the AC. I own one winter coat... I almost always wear my hoodie under it... that is... if I can't get away with only wearing my hoodie. You may very well be on to something here.

    ReplyDelete
  61. Yes! Wearing hoodies on a regular basis is a lezzie sign!
    First girl I ever hooked up with? She was the reason I realized that zip-up hoodies are an essential gay wardrobe item.
    I am currently in possession of 5 hoodies.
    (One of them technically belongs to my girlfriend.)

    ...However, I have 6 more stored at home (I'm living abroad right now).
    I can't give them up. I know I never wear them. But the unreasonable desire for many hoodies is as ingrained in me as my love of ladies ;)

    ReplyDelete
  62. I only have one brief comment: the girl in the picture with the double thumbs-up? Jesus Christ, someone please give that girl my number.

    ReplyDelete
  63. I failed the hoodie quiz. I only own one.

    ReplyDelete
  64. This is hysterical; my partner's got an insane infatuation with hoodies that I thought was only about the fact that they're always freezing. Apparently I was wrong! Personally I am the jacket-type homo, but we can't all vanish into super comfort, I guess.

    ReplyDelete
  65. 1) my hoodie.

    2) nope. i only own one, and it is literally almost solely for the purpose of lounging around the house or getting coffee on days that are either chilly or too lazy for a bra.

    3) n/a

    4) n/a

    5) false, i think. well, not for the WHOLE day, but for a coffee run probably.

    so i fail. femme invisibility for the lose.

    ReplyDelete
  66. NO! I have an intrinsic hatred for hoodies. The thought of wearing one makes me cringe and I believe hoodies can never cross into the realms of stylish. Maybe I just dress too formally (vintage blouses, tapered trousers and bowler hats 4eva), maybe I just enjoy slightly more eccentric/sophisticated/avant-garde clothing but I will not be caught dead in a hoodie.It might also have something to do with my fixation for either strucural centre pieces (e.g. a cape, polo neck, structured coat) or layering thinner pieces which hoodies always seem to obscure as well as my fixation on silk, cashmere and chunky wool garments which make me detest them so.

    Each to their own. Stlye need not be sacrificed to comfort.

    ReplyDelete
  67. Oh, hoodies. I myself am particular to the *slightly too small* turned inside out 80's lookin' sweatshirts. They're warm, period.

    I DO have a dressier hoodie, and I just tossed my ratty, ratty best-worn hoodie. I am on the hunt for a new one.

    But otherwise: I can't imagine owning more than, say, 5. Maybe that's my very eclectic, extremely diverse closet of clothes talking. I like it.

    I'm ready for the layering-weather. It makes for an excellent cuddling excuse.

    ReplyDelete
  68. too bad i didn't know about this awhile ago :p i am a geek so i counted 34 not counting the dirty ones in my laundry pile from this week. thanks krista for the tip! ill wear them in 80 degree weather, or during a blizzard. hoodies are kind of my guilty pleasure since im Femme, and mostly dress up, but on my more tomboy days, or really anytime, who's kidding! i make them work. you can def pull off femme with a hoodie, i have it down to a science. :p

    ReplyDelete
  69. I have been having this same realization with stripes lately...at least in San Diego anyway.

    ReplyDelete
  70. I love hoodies. That's the first sections that i go too in stores. Many colors, including pink and shit brown green. I love them. I also stole one from my lesbian fried who had stolen it from her gf. But i really love my labbit hoodie from kidrobot.

    ReplyDelete
  71. I only wear two hoodies, but I wear them so frequently that it throws my friends off if I wear a different type of jacket. I wear a leather jacket pretty often as well, but usually with a hoodie under it.

    ReplyDelete
  72. hoodies hoodies hoodies!

    I have a hoodie on almost continually (including when sleeping) from about mid September until mid May.

    ReplyDelete
  73. Woa. So true. Wearing one atm. Also, I have about 10 different hoodies I think... Which I wear, a lot. I don't really go a day without. HOWEVER! I often wear a jacket over the hoodie. That's a variable you didn't include. It's cold in Norway.

    ReplyDelete
  74. "Hoodie" doesn't even seem like a real word anymore after reading this post and the comments lol, but I love 'em. I like the ones with giant hoods that can hide your eyes, and I love sharing hoodies, when you go to someone's house, and it's chillier than you expected, or someone is staying with you. It's so personal and nice.

    ReplyDelete
  75. I'd like to tell you that Paris Hilton IS a big 'mo. Evidence? Follow this: http://s1.zetaboards.com/L_Anon/topic/4299791/9/

    Secondly, can't believe you never thought of the hoodie!! I'm really happy, it's the first time I read something on your blog that I already knew :)

    ReplyDelete
  76. No hoodies for me, except when I'm working out. I think the reason is that I never wear pants-- literally never-- and a hoodie or track jacket just looks silly with skirts and dresses. Beyond that, hoods and I just don't get along. They mess up my hair and I think they make my face look strangely long and narrow and alien.

    Now CARDIGANS, on the other hand...

    I wear cardigans like it's my fucking job. I wear cardigans TO my fucking job, even though it's sometimes too hot for them and I have a uniform anyway so there's really no point. I wear cardigans in situations that are slightly cardigan inappropriate, like at bars with straight friends where I'd really be better off wearing something strapless and shiny. I wear one every day, possibly layered underneath a (straight-looking?) light jacket or blazer. I have at least fifteen cardigans or cardigan/sweatery type items. My girlfriend (though she is, to be fair, a consummate gay hoodie-wearer) is also inclined towards the cardigan. She recently splurged on this ghastly mustard-colored specimen which I find awful and hideous yet which I somehow can't bring myself to hate because it's a CARDIGAN, for chrissakes.

    Cardigans. Yes, cardigans. Can we make cardigans a queer lady thing, please?

    ReplyDelete
  77. I live in the tropics. So this doesn't help me at all. sniffle

    ReplyDelete
  78. Something in not a hoodie if it doesn't have a hood. Srsly. Then it is just a second layer of sorts that you put on because it is fall. How is that gay?

    ReplyDelete
  79. "Anonymous said...

    i waited over 2 weeks for your new post krista-face. i find it so boring, i am insulted. goddammitt not even a good laugh."<-----THIS here are the feelings I am also experiencing. *sigh*

    ReplyDelete
  80. Hoodies are like sweatpants to me. only worn in the house when I'm half awake. I only own one hoodie and one pair of sweatpants, but prefer to roam around naked indoors (I resonated a lot more with that blog post!) than to wear them. My personal style tends to be a bit more structured, but I am in search for a speckled grey one to wear underneath a black leather jacket :)

    ReplyDelete
  81. Definitely a thing with me and my roommates!

    ReplyDelete
  82. Christ. I just went to the thrift and bought another hoodie, a really thin one because it's louisiana and it's still hot, but its fall dammit and I want to wear a hoodie!

    On another note, I went to an all girls catholic high school. we had to have a uniform sweatshirt. we could choose between one with NO ZIPPER and NO POCKETS and NO HOOD, or one with all of those things. Guess what all the queer girls had. I still wear mine :p

    ReplyDelete
  83. I second the anonymous post about hoodies making your face look like a giant clit, especially with a fig fluffy hoodie, the hood up framing your face, the zipper unzipped part ways...

    ReplyDelete
  84. So, this post started talking about Fall, which is a guaranteed way to get lots of fall-owers. And then it became all about hoodies, and I thought, "What the blazers is this?"

    Fun times, reading this.

    ReplyDelete
  85. i love hoodies. i love cardigans. i actually had to look up what a "light jacket" is because in my mind i just thought... what else could you wear besides a hoodie?

    ReplyDelete
  86. 1) I'm in GA, so it's still 80+ outside, but were I at home/if it was cold. Hoodie.

    2) yes.

    3) nnnn---yeah...

    4) Yes.

    5) I will sometimes wear multiple hoodies/zip-up things to avoid jacket-wearing.

    ReplyDelete
  87. Astonished by the lack of swooning over Tanya; seriously, does no one in SF read this? Sexiest bartender ever. So sad she's leaving.

    ReplyDelete
  88. Well, this explains my life long addiction to having unreasonable amounts of hoodies.
    My door is currently broken because I hang them on the back of it and the weight made the hinges bend.
    Oops/

    ReplyDelete
  89. I have a fleece quarter-zip (no hood) that I tend to live in (unless I'm going out to a party or something) once it gets colder, does that count?
    Other than that though, I actually really like structured jackets, especially ones with a lot of pockets and an overall military look, or leather jackets. My obsession with those two types of outwear is deadly.

    ReplyDelete
  90. Except for Femmes - we love cute little knitted cardigans - and yes, one needs many cardigans - some are far more dressy than others. Particularly the original vintage ones with beautiful embroidery.

    ReplyDelete
  91. oh though I do sometimes wear my ex-gf's hoodie from the Gay Games... Can you get any queerer than that ;)

    ReplyDelete
  92. As much as I love fall and winter for my cardigans, I don't know what I would do without my plethora of hoodies. I LOVE THEM. Love them love them love them. As soon as stores started stocking them I promptly took my broke ass shopping for new hoodies. And as someone who could generally be considered closer to the femme end of the spectrum, I find that when I wear my hoodies I get a lot more attention from the ladies than I do otherwise.

    Also I would like to add that, no joke, as I was in the middle of reading this post my girlfriend called out from the bedroom asking if she could borrow one of my hoodies.

    ReplyDelete
  93. I live in hoodies always have lovethemlovelovethem.. they're like the most important thing in my wardrobe!

    ReplyDelete
  94. Oh my, I never noticed this before! I'll have to keep my eyes open.
    (Though I'm totally guilty with 10+ different kinds/styles)

    ReplyDelete
  95. I think we almost need a separate entry for the north face fleece phenom.

    (I would own one, but I've been cursed with poverty since my decision to major in the arts)

    ReplyDelete
  96. Sorry, I actually wear light jackets almost every day. Actually, A light jacket. Just one. I've had it since 3rd grade when I stole it ftom my uncle's brother. That jacket has seen me through blizzards, swine flu, almost every day of middle school, and that shitty 5th grade feild trip where it rained the entire time.
    That being said, I've actually noticed that now that I own hoodies, I only really wear it when it rains.
    Also, I have a dress hoodie I wear to church. It's dressy because you can tell it's from the girls section.
    And cardigans suck. Just saying.

    ReplyDelete
  97. ok, I'm gonna say its because hoodies are casual AND gender-neutral. aaaannnnddd.... There's a dyke thing with American Apparel. Don't deny it. They make the ultimate dyke underpants, too.

    ReplyDelete
  98. before reading this post, I sat staring into my suitcase, trying to decide if I could justify wearing my red thermal hoody under the light canvas jacket i own even though the only scarf i have is also red and i'm in fucking northern ireland and need it. i decided against it in favor of a wool sweater (men's, from Gap, soooooo) but it was tough. the more i gaze into my suitcase, the more my life makes sense. thanks girl.

    ReplyDelete
  99. This is beyond true. I asked a girl at uni out simply because she was always wearing the SAME hoodie. (She was gay of course, but already with someone.)
    I will be wearing the femmiest dress ever and if it's chilly I will put a still put a big ugly hoodie over that pretty motherfucker.

    ReplyDelete
  100. Suprisingly, as a 'mo, I fail the hoodie test. I am not hoodie lover. I have a few and yes they are def zip up, and I do prefer them over a coat. Though, perhaps my femme style has to do with this?

    But my girlfriend, now she loves hoodies. It's difficult to get her out of them sometimes. haha

    ReplyDelete
  101. I have like 15 hoodies. And one coat. And I live in MANI-FUCKING-TOBA. it is parka weather 70% of the year. I might have a hoodie obsession.

    ReplyDelete
  102. I love hoodies, but I think it's just a student thing; they are like the university students uniform. You end up with one from every club your in and one from your course as well. I never see many nice zippy up hoodies though, only have one out of maybe 10. No one I know, gay or straight would wear a hoody in club though, do you not melt with the heat?

    ReplyDelete
  103. On a side note, you've seen this, right? http://dailybunny.org/post/10402450054/bunzillas

    ReplyDelete
  104. I have NEVER, in all my life, worn a hoodie to the Lex. This is shocking to approximately no one.

    ReplyDelete
  105. While I commend your scientific method, I am inclined to conduct my own survey. In my day today, I have encountered 6 gay women (not including nameless strangers), none of whom were wearing a hoodie (though i did BRING one for my girlfriend to wear tomorrow - with RUNNING clothes).

    Anything in common? 6 for 6 had some kind of buttons on their shirt/vest/cardigan, this may be an area to pursue further.

    My results may be skewed given that the bulk of my sample is in academia - but it's Friday - and we ALL had button up shirts... not a hoodie in sight!

    ReplyDelete
  106. I live in a freaking tropical country and rock hoodies. HOODIES ARE JUST AWESOME. It's like I'm wrapped in a hug when I'm wearing one. They are just like security blankets. I hate umbrellas so I use them when it rains. I need more hoodies. Sometimes I just consider forgoing a top and just pulling on a hoodie when I go out.

    Course my straigh chick friends, wear hoodies but only when the A/C is banging in our lecture halls.

    ReplyDelete
  107. ...Shit, I've been wearing hoodies since I hit puberty... Add yet ANOTHER item to the "Things I Love and Didn't Know Were Gay" list.

    ReplyDelete
  108. question. what is a natty boi??

    ReplyDelete
  109. OMG, everything in my wardrobe consist of a hood! even my jackets have hoods...im so lesbian lol

    ReplyDelete
  110. I own countless hoodies and they are definitely a staple in my very gay and boi-ish wardrobe. Hoodies, cardigans, and leather jackets pretttttty much make up my fall/winter wear. Although I do also own many many sweaters from various men's departments...although maybe by your definition those count as hoodies? Ha.

    ReplyDelete
  111. Yesssss hoodies always and forever.

    ReplyDelete
  112. I enjoy hoodies... but... come on. Cardigans for the win!!! Although I'm more on the femme-y, but still CARDIGANS. buttons!!!

    1) It honestly depends what sort of light jacket it is... If its buttons, I'd take the hoodie cuz it's easier. It also depends whether or not I'm wearing a bra and how my hair looks andand a bunch of other stuff I calculate in half a second.

    2) Nope

    3) n/a

    4) I have a favorite hoodie, yes.

    5) True

    ReplyDelete
  113. GUYS. GUYS. HOLY SHIT. I JUST REALIZED SOMETHING FANTASTIC ABOUT CARDIGANS THAT ALL YOU BOIS ALREADY KNEW.

    I hate trying to find the right kind of cardigan- buttonup, not long and frilly, practical... I SHOULD TRY THE MEN'S SECTION.

    holy shit why didn't I think of this before?

    ReplyDelete
  114. Uh, well, my favorite hoodie has "So Homo" printed across the back in huge letters, so the whole quiz is kind of a moot point for me.

    ReplyDelete
  115. This was about as interesting as eating asbestos. C'mon krista! Hoodies are the new international symbols for lemme touch your box? Please. Please. Please. I know you work hard to entertain us, but fuhreal I'm not even interested in this shit.

    ReplyDelete
  116. First off, who is Chase?? She's beautiful.

    Second, where can I get a "So Homo" hoodie...?

    ReplyDelete
  117. Yes, Hoodies tend to be rather gay. Although they're like plaid, it all depends on how you wear them and what type they are.

    For the record I have like 8 hoodies of different materials, thicknesses, colors and patterns, and I rarely leave my house without one. If it's too cold, I'll throw a leather jacket on over said hoodie. If it's too hot I'll take one of the lighter ones and pair it with cut offs or gym shorts. The point is they're as important as pants at this point, and the only way I don't wear one is if the occasion is *gasp* too fancy for hoodie.

    ReplyDelete
  118. this was so so so so so so so so so so so so so sosososoososossosoososososososoososososo BORING

    ReplyDelete
  119. I look terrible in hoodies. But I have this one t-shirt with a hood that I found... This needs to be a thing.

    ReplyDelete
  120. I would like to register my agreement and excitement about CARDIGANS. Fucking love cardigans. I own cute-tight-cropped-bolerotype cardigans for my rockabilly days, i have two in leopard print (one tight, one super fluffy and woolen, for my slut-for-leopard-print days of varying temperatures), i have girly floral ones for my i-need-to-wear-a-dress-but-spring-in-melbourne-sucks days, i have preppy knitted ones for hanging-out-with-the-rents, i have loose cotton ones for my hipster days.
    I have two hoodies: one i wear to work because i don't mind it getting dirty but i wouldn't let the customers see me in it. I also have a puffy parka thing with a fur-lined hood... it's a little tartan, too, so it's kind of the gayest thing i own apart from lesbian boots.

    Importantly: Cardigans Rule!

    ReplyDelete
  121. It's not uncommon for me to sleep in my hoodie and a skull cap. For serious.

    ReplyDelete
  122. Oh man I guess am not counted as dyke since I don't have 1..usually I got my leather / jeans jacket along or just a plain fit T shirt. Am proud to show my muscle that way hehe.

    By showing appreciation to your long post on hoodie, I will consider to buy one hah.



    Asian dyke, Jackie

    ReplyDelete
  123. Hoodies are all fine and good, but I flipped the fuck out when I saw that sandal picture. OH MY GOD WHAT ARE THOSE AMAZING SANDALS I NEED THOSE IN MY LIFE

    Seriously, high school was made of leather lace-up sandals for me. I got the same kind every year when the last pair wore out, and then a different kind by the same company after they stopped making the same kind. But eventually those petered out too and my life was a dearth of lace-up sandals. But now...

    Well, Googling has revealed it's some kind of bungee cord rig, but close enough and they probably come in purple gimme

    I did not realize what a lesbian I was until I met the perfect girl a couplefew years ago, somethefuckhow. Anyway, I should probably be thinking more of hoodies than sandals what with winter coming up (though I'm the type to wear sandals up to the point when snow is deep enough to be taller than the soles)... obviously there's nothing wrong with picking up both, though.

    ReplyDelete
  124. Oh geez. I basically never leave the house without a leather jacket.. But as soon as I'm inside somewhere? Hoodie. Even in the summer. ._. When I was a kid, I'd wear hoodies in the summer... I'd put on the hood part and let the rest fly around behind me like a cape. I was never, ever without a hoodie, and that includes trying to go swimming in one a few times. This post made me laugh hysterically... And then check to see if you were considering selling blog-themed hoodies.

    ReplyDelete
  125. Unbelievable! Not only does my GF appear in this post, but we've had an ongoing debate about the pullover hoodie (her) vs the zip up (me). I'm happy to out gay her just this once and it doesn't happen very often since she's a boi. (Full disclosure: I'll have to confess to over wearing my Catamounts pullover hoodie to the point where I had to actually be forbidden for a while : / But, honestly, a Catamounts hoodie? Is there better gaygear in all the world than that?)

    ReplyDelete
  126. As I was typing in the Effing Dykes URL, I shivered, and pulled over the hood on my hoodie. Which I'm fiercely proud of, and rotate through all of my other hoodies, and regularly get obsessed with one hoodie. I curse the weather when it's slightly too warm for a hoodie.

    ReplyDelete
  127. I only own two hoodies, both are strictly for sleeping, or for when I'm so sick that I need to fetus all day long. I never wear a hoodie outside.

    Cardigans are my gay thing.

    ReplyDelete
  128. So I saw this commercial the other day and laughed at first, because I instantly thought of this post...but then my chuckle turned into a frown as the filthy taste of mass-marketed gender norms entered my mouth:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C9LTRbWsGOI

    ReplyDelete
  129. cardigans in, and hoodies out

    ReplyDelete
  130. I just realized my girlfriend doesn't own any outerwear except for hoodies, flannels, and a mens' snowboarding jacket. Well damn

    ReplyDelete
  131. Goodness. The more I read this blog, the more I realize how gay I am. Can't believe no one told me I was when I was still in denial.
    Oh, and apparently, we're allowed to ask for phone numbers here? I too want that double thumbs up lady's number! Let the competition begin! ha!

    ReplyDelete
  132. Even my leather jacket is a hoodie. You are so right.

    ReplyDelete
  133. what about vests? are we gonna talk about how gay the vest family is? sweater, fancy/tuxedo, puffy down, wool, cut-off-sweatshirts - a sure tip-off. and incredibly genderfriendly.

    ReplyDelete
  134. Oh my Lord. I have dyke-hoodies. O.O I have two college hoodies that I wear to class, and then one that I only wear at home. And I usually wear a jacket UNDER my hoodie so that I don't have to be seen wearing a jacket. (Unless I'm riding my motorcycle...)

    ReplyDelete
  135. i have a grey zip up hoodie that i wear everyday..either by itself or under something.. so sad but so true..ha
    www.facebook.com/lifebeforecars my band. :)

    ReplyDelete
  136. Amazing blog, as always.
    I noticed this on the most recent "third wheel" date I went on. Maybe I should put this under your most recent post, but I was asked along to one of those coffee talk dates. Since my friend was unsure, and didn't know the girl very well, she asked me to attend their meeting.
    As I sat there, listening to their cute awkward first date convo, I started subconsciously analyzing their outfits and realizing they were both wearing hoodies, either under jackets or alone. We later went to the big lez bar in town.
    It wasn't that cold. Majority had hoodies on.
    I also chalk this up to the hipster movement which has fully embraced androgyny. At first I was mad at them making it harder to tell gay from straight. Now I say, if you can't beat 'em- join em.

    #thinkingofchangingintoahoodie

    ReplyDelete
  137. Now I see why I natuarlly gravitate towards hoodies, it must be programed into my gay instincts. Currently I have no zip hoodies, and I would like at least one. Better get right on that. While doing the lesbian ruffle. Yeah!

    ReplyDelete
  138. I don't like wearing hoodies since I live in a very hot country, but I do find it "gay" when I see girls walking around in hoodies, great gaydar tip, thank you!

    ReplyDelete
  139. i love hoodies!!!
    too bad that i get to wear hoodies only when is winter and fall, here's is very warm when is summer :\

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. sleeveless hoodies obviously! ;)

      Delete
  140. I guess I must be one of those Dressy types then. I have a hoodie that I wear a little, but it doesn't zip up...all of my other overclothing is something like a light sweater or jacket. I only own one or two hoodies. Not to mention I slip under almost all gaydars, though...

    ReplyDelete
  141. I love hoodies! It's funny because my favorite hoodies have my lacrosse number and crossed sticks above the breast. I'm a sporty dyke I guess! But I promise I don't punch shoulders

    ReplyDelete
  142. Yes!! So completely a lover of hoodies! I have one for every occasion and they are all very specific. Totally rocking to lezzer hoody!

    ReplyDelete