Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Toy Story

[via hellogirls.tumblr.com]
Heya gaymos!

I come to you as one broken.

Today is a day of grief; a day of remembrance. 

Today I got rid of my beautiful silver glitter dildo.
[via concerthall]
The one I've had for years, the one I always turn to. 
My standby, my darling. 

GlitterDick.
Y'allfags, there are obvs other toys in my life.  

But this one was my favorite. 

As I stood over the trash, bent with grief, the memories came flooding (that was an accident but it stays) back:

I remembered winning GlitterDick.
[thanks kameko]

It was at the now-closed Minneapolis dyke bar, Pi, and it was the last Dildo Bingo night before they shut the doors forever. 

Dildo Bingo is just like regular bingo, but you have to scream “DILDO!!!” at the top of your lungs if you win, and they give away sex toys as prizes.

You don’t yell it loud enough, you don’t get your prize.
[via indiequeer]

The prizes were great, too - vag and queer friendly stuff from Minnapolis’s best sex toy store, Smitten Kitten.

I was trolling near the stage, looking at all the prizes, when it caught my eye:

Gorgeous.

Glittering silver in the stage lights.

Like a shy but stunning drag queen, making her demure, sequined debut.

Streamlined.

Not shaped even remotely like a penis – no ‘realistic’ veining, no freaky ‘natural-looking' wrinkles.

Not too thick, not too little, juuuust right.

An elegant, sparkling, long drink of water.

The Goldilocks of dildos.

It winked at me. 

I winked back, whispering, “You WILL be mine.”
[viaz0mbiebreath]
Then I went back to my table. 
Bought three bingo cards. 

The numbers were called. 
D-6.
L-41.
I-23.

And then…BINGO! 

 I couldn’t believe it! I never win! 

“DILDO!!!!” I screamed. 


“DIIIIIILLLLLLDOOOOOOOO!!!!!”

I bolted to the stage, where they handed me my beautiful shining prize.

Clutching my phallic trophy, I fairly wept with joy.

Sally Fields winning her Oscar.
Miss America.

They know how I felt that day.

That was three years ago.

And ever since then, me and GlitterDick have had times.

I remembered bringing it home and lovingly putting it into its harness. 

I remember being grateful I had a harness gorgeous enough to withstand GlitterDick’s sophistication.

I remember using it for the first time.

I remember having it used on me for the first time.

It was love.  
It was love.

Magical silver rain.


I remember gently putting GlitterDick to bed with its friends in the no-no trunk. 

And getting it out again.

Over and over, on and on.

Three years, we were together.

GlitterDick had seen me through a move to Minneapolis from Taiwan, a move to Seattle, a two-year tour through all 50 states, Canada, Mexico, and a move to Chicago

It had elicited squeals of delight from all who saw it.  
Everyone loved GlitterD
[via detroitbred]
Why wouldn't they?

It had no equal.

HOW COULD I JUST THROW GLITTERDICK AWAY???

I had to, homos. 
I had no choice.
[via girlsiwouldmarry]

As if it were a vicious dog, sentenced to destruction by the courts. 


I had to get rid of the only silicone friend I’d ever truly loved.

I promised CJ.

*Backstory!*

I had been using my glorious GlitterDick with CJ since I’d won it.

When I took the job that sent me to a different city every day, I often packed GlitterDick in my bag. 

You know.  So I’d have a friend on the road.
[via lesbianunicornprincess, thanks E.F.]
Well, it turned out I met some new friends on the road, and while that’s relationship-sanctioned by CJ

She did not know I’d shared the glory of GlitterDick with anyone else.

I thought she knew and just didn’t care.


So: After using it together one day, I made a comment about how no one else could wield GlitterDick like CJ could. 

She was like the Lord of the One Ring – others could pull sexytime power from GlitterDick, but only she could tap into the full orgasmic stores it offered.

It was a compliment!

CJ instantly pulled away from me.

WHAT. This is our toy,” she said flatly.

“No,” I said. “This is my toy. That we use.”

Holyfuckingshit, apparently not.


WAS I IN TROUBLE.

Nothing I said made a difference.

“But-but-I boiled it!” I stammered.  “Every time! And used a condom!”

CJ's jaw was doing that scary twitchy thing it does when she’s pissed.
http://www.unusualyoung.com
Thinking, by her silence, that I was making logical headway, I pressed on.

Further into damnation.

“Plus, baby - it’s silicone! And it’s from Smitten Kitten! These things are designed to be non-porous! And I really did boil it and use a condom on it, every time, I swear to God.”

Um. 
That was not the issue.
[thanks amanda]
CJ, once she’d recovered from her fury enough to speak, said that it wasn’t about safety – she fucking assumed I’d be using a toy safely with a strange girl, and did I think I was going to get brownie points for doing what I was supposed to be doing anyway???

No.  It was not about safety. Safety was a given.

It was about…juju.

Special lesbian toy juju.

This was a toy we’d used together, and so now it was our toy.
Not to be used with anyone else.
[http://inhobbok.tumblr.com/]

Not to be used with anyone else???

This was the greatest dildo in the world we were talking about!

This wasn’t just a dong, this was GLITTERDICK!!!

CJ didn’t care.

She just really didn’t care. 

She didn’t see how I could use GlitterDick with anyone else, and she didn’t care how illogical that might or might not be.

So every time I maybe, possibly even thought about using a toy with someone else…I had to get a new one?

Yup.

It’s a hard world out there for sluts, faggettes.
[via http://thechocolatebrigade.tumblr.com]

Quality toys don’t come cheap, as I’m sure you know.

Sure, you can pick up a pussy-poisoning, environment-killing, female-exploiting porous piece of toxic trash at any local sex store, but the good shit – the comes-from-a-woman-owned-and-woman-and-queer-friendly store, vagina-safe, quality tested, safe-sex-friendly toys cost plenty.

GlitterDick alone retails for around $90.

And it was my toy! Mine! 
I won that shit!
[http://le-minge.tumblr.com/]
I was just sharing with CJ.  Generously! 
She was lucky!

CJ did not, um, see things that way.

She was furious I hadn’t told her I’d been using it with anyone else. 

I was thunderstruck that she hadn’t known that all along. 

Sluts I’m kind of clueless sometimes. 

The thing that gets me in the most trouble in all relationships is that I think people can read my mind.
[http://crooksandqueens.tumblr.com/]

I just assumed she knew I’d been using it.

Now, before you all rip me to shreds: 

CJ’s right.  

It was my job to make sure she knew exactly what GlitterDick and I had been up to. 

I fucked up big time.

CJ has a right to decide what goes near her, especially if she might be at risk.
[via geekstyledyke]
She’s absolutely in the right.

And now I feel awful.

Really irresponsible.
Making a bad name for sex-positivity everywhere.

So, as token of having learned an important lesson, and in a fit of relief that this fight didn’t get a lot worse, I swore I would get rid of GlitterDick.  
[via film-grain]
But now I have questions.
Lots of questions.

1)  Do y’allfags share toys (SAFELY!!!) with different partners?

2)  What happens when a relationship goes belly-up? 
Do beautiful and beloved toys get thrown away?
What about the SUPER AWESOME ONES?

3)  What do queers that sleep around a lot do?

4)  Do they have to get a second job to pay for all the toys?
[via ITSOKAYTOBEGAY]
I opened the garbage can.

I dropped GlitterDick in.  A rubbery thud.

Lonely-sounding.
[via DIAMONDSANDFILTH]
I closed the lid.

A single, silver tear glittered from my eye.

125 comments:

  1. don't be sad! you'll find a dildo just as good soon. to be exclusively shared with cj!

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  2. you know what glitterdick would look amazing in? this harness:

    http://tinyurl.com/3b8gfue

    (i want it so bad!)

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  3. R.I.P Glitterdick.

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  4. I have that dildo! That same beautiful, glittery, perfectly shaped dick and I very stupidly left it with all of my other things when my girlfriend and I decided to go traveling FOR OVER A YEAR. Now, with two more months to go until that most wonderful piece of silicon is back in my hand/harness/cunt, I think about it way more than one should think about a toy. I don't have answers for your questions but I do offer you some sympathy because whether you were wrong or not, it's the best effing dildo a girl could have.

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  5. I agree ashleigh! and it's name is leon, or at least that's what the tag said when I got him....

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  6. I died repeatedly. More importantly: you now have an excuse to go toy shopping! Without the little kid implications.

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  7. i see both sides, definitely, but i fall in line with CJ. i just bought the spareparts joque harness and a dildo for me and my not-so-girlfriend. i'm exclusive with her, she's not exclusive with me (but only messes with guys, not other girls). we've already had the conversation about not being used with other people, but that's because it's mine, not hers and that's what i'm comfortable with. it's not all safety, i think part of it is... emotions?

    but... whitney from the real l word... she sleeps with plenty of women and i'm pretty sure she doesn't use a new toy for each lady.

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  8. Uh devil's advocate but, speaking as a guy that seems ridiculous. Should I swap out my dick if I swap partners?

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  9. GlitterDick looks amazing. My condolences. I havn't yet run into this problem, and I'm pretty sure that my lovergirl doesn't really give a shit, but maybe I better check on that one... anyway, I have a suggestion for not repeating this tragedy:

    What if you have toys that you use only with CJ (as well as separate toys for exclusive use with any other recurring/regular partners) and then have a set for the road/for everyone else (to use safely, of course)? One night stands, in my mind, do not get exclusive dibs on MY toys. Because you're right, that's waaaay too expensive... Anyway, maybe that can work for you! Hope so!

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  10. I know I'm missing the main point here, but are my wife and I the only monogamous lesbians in the world??

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  11. That is pretty tragic.

    What is probably even more tragic is that I have never even seen, much less used, any kind of sex toy. And I've been ladybangin' for a long time. I haven't really seen the point.

    ...but maybe I'll give it a try...

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  12. Photos very on point this post--fun! We have a GD who is known as Mr. Luck, and I can vouch for the capital A awesomeness. Sending my condolences for the demise of Glitterdick, painful, but totally the right move. And I second the idea for the "home" and "away" sets of toys.

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  13. okay-can I post a totally unrelated comment here?
    I know there has been mention of the lesbian haircut before-but how the fuck do ya'll explain to a hairdresser whet you want-especially since I've never had a dyke haircut before and don't really know what I want-do you all just diy or have a friend cut you're hair? As the largest lesbo community I know please help a girl out, I'm sick of people assuming I'm straight Thank you!

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  14. I guess the best idea would be one for home, and one for abroad.

    or maybe, sort of, the one for special occasions, and one for daily use.

    Like getting out the good silverware and dishes.

    But with sex.

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  15. dyke haircut: don't try to go to the trendiest spot. they usually can't cut hair for shit. go to the stylist who can do the best, most precise cut and give her/him a zillion pictures and be super specific. I feel you on that whole comment, gurl. good luck and may you and your hair someday grace Effing Dykes.

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  16. Okay, now I feel completely ignorant. I would never have thought there's anything wrong with keeping one sex toy for different people. I own only one dildo, I bought it in a "girls only" store with my ex and I kept it after we broke up. Now I regularly use it with my current gf. Has never been an issue. (Also, I never boiled it, nor used a condom. The seller told me that it would be enought to wash it with soap and hot water after use, and I always wash it again before re-using. Am I being unsafe?)

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  17. I'm with the anonymous guy actually. Guys don't swap out their dicks with each new girl, why should we? Especially since our cost money. I don't (yet) own a dildo, but I don't see why I need more than one. My ex had one that I knew she used with her ex, but it didn't even occur to me that she should get a new one. I'm siding with you on this. It was your toy, and maybe I'm just new to the community, but I definitely would've assumed you used it on other girls. Unless I and my gf buy a toy together for the purpose of it being 'our toy,' than it's mine to do with as I wish.

    That being said, I'm also not the type to be with more than one person at a time (not from any moral dilemma, just get rather mono-focused) so it's really a nonissue for me, but maybe I just don't see the intricacies of the problem.

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  18. Anon and Anon's Wifey:

    Maybe I just read the wrong blogs, but lesbian monogamy has become so rare that it seems cutting edge. Ladies, I salute you. Reclaim that old frontier!

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  19. Soooooooooo...in other words, an innocent, expensive, and still perfectly functioning toy had to pay the price as some kind of symbolic sacrificial lamb to appease CJ for her lack of defined boundaries for extra-relational partners? And for your lack of consideration that this might be an issue.

    Glitterdick is the real victim here. Sure, it's an inanimate object, but it has always done what it was supposed to do. Like the Triforce, it is only as good/evil as the person using it.

    You two need to get over yourselves a bit. As a multiamorist (polyamory mixes greek and latin), I'm VERY used to the almost legislative detail multiple partner agreements we all endure for the purposes of understanding boundaries including fetishized objects. We NEVER assume implied understandings on things like this.

    Normally I'm with you, but in this case I only side with Glitterdick. You guys should've started over again with a new policy instead of abandoning a good and loyal toy for your own shame.

    Aside from that, this entry was hilarious as always.

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  20. Hm well, I must say I personally don't get the need to switch them out between people as long as you are safe, but I know even some straight couples view toys as being a one person only deal. I figure its an an emotional thing, that only matters to some people. Since it matters to her it makes sense to get stuff that's for home and away as previously mentioned.

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  21. 1) Yes! Of course! Maybe not boiling, but those little handy wipes.

    2) They enter the trash can if they were bought with the couple in mind... If they came along before, then it's debatable.

    3) Well, you have a dildo that doesn't get emotionally attached. A whoring dildo.

    4) Almost... But it's worth it if you get your moneys worth out of the toy.

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  22. Oh thanks for making me WANT to use that friend again -with some new one. I pushed my ex-gf into buying and trying toys some years ago. She had never done it before, although she did have a lot of girls on her "done" list. Weird, i know. She was my first, and i found out she was very prude. Too much for me anyway. BUT i considered i was entitled to keep the toys we had bought together, as i was the most likely of us two to really have fun with them. Maybe i was being a tiny bit revengeful on that one, too. But i kept them. And bought new ones. And ALWAYYYS use a condom with them! Mareike, come on!
    Besides i have a fun story that includes my ex *too prude* gf, a dishwasher, a bright pink dildo and some helpful and surprised straight friend of mine, haha...

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  23. I always make VERY CLEAR when toys come up in a new sleeping-arrangement that my lovely feeldoe is MINE. not ours. I haven't been as lucky to procure my dalliance-allowed license, but this little blue baby has followed me from baby-dykedom and nobody but me gets to own that. So, set boundarys beforehand? But otherwise, I'm with you and think that your toy is yours to do with as you see fit within the accepted (and verbally stated!) limits of your relationship.

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  24. Seriously, unless I've agreed that a toy is "hers", it's MINE, to be done with whatever I like. Up until the point where we agree otherwise.

    However, misunderstandings happen. In that instance, I think my plan - assuming that g/f was more packing a sad rather than throwing a tantie, in which case she could get stuffed - would have been to take the g/f shopping for a SPECIAL toy for HER. While reserving your sparkly toy for your other pals who wanted it used on them.

    I've been lucky enough that my partners have been pretty explicit with what limits they have with toy-sharing, and I tend to assume that if it matters to someone, they will spell out their expectations. If they don't, I default to thinking that my toys are mine to do what I like with, so long as they're clean and safe.

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  25. What has worked with us: harnesses go with the person wearing them, toys go with the person having it used on them. I have not gotten into any situations where I'm into the same toys as I like to use on my partners.

    Part of that may be because I have multiple partners because I do different things with them, so different dicks makes sense.

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  26. Personally I think if you’re not in a monogamous relationship than you don’t need to get new toys every time. Hell, maybe you could have a set of toys for monogamous relationships and one for party peoples! That way you can save some cash and still reuse your fancy toys =) Like china for company. Except your actual partner should get the good stuff. The company can have plastic.

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  27. This is going to be so gay of me, but did you consider recycling your beloved glitterdick? http://www.sextoyrecycling.com/

    Anyway let's clarify something here: there are toys that you got yourself and share... and then there are toys that you get as a couple.

    Your toys are your toys are your toys. Be generous with them if you like, or not, but they're your toys. Personally I think glitterdick falls under that category.

    As for the toys you got as a couple... gosh I am like such a spendthrift and can't throw anything away, especially a good hunk o silicone - lezzie juju be damned. But I suppose that should be negotiated when you get the toys. Just a little innocent "oh haaay, so what do you think about all those queermos who throw away toys when they break up?" Feel it out. Who knows, your partner may be into hashing out a cock custody plan instead of throwing away perfectly amazing toys.

    True story: I once had a terribly dramatic breakup with someone that involved her THROWING DILDOES AT MY HEAD while she screamed at me and sobbed.

    Of course I took the goods and ran.

    I know that makes me sound like a total asshole and a freak, but lezzzbereal, there ain't nobody who can get me to throw away a VixSkin cock. Nobody. Light some incense, put it through the dishwasher and baptize it under the full moon or whatever. That shit is too valuable to toss in a garbage can.

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  28. for haircuts- take a photo of the hair style you want and they will try their best to copy it.

    sex toys- i support the suggestion to get 'home' and 'away' sets of toys. if they are the same toys in both sets, put them in different places so they don't get mixed up!

    nonmonogamy- my partner and i are into it but i'm so shy i never get to enjoy the freedom and my partner swears she only has eyes for me. ha! we're hopelessly monogamous but open to possibilities.

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  29. My wife and I are monogamous, too, but I'm with Haven on the rules of sex toys: get some that are just for CJ and some that are for everyone else, and don't mix. You, of course, can use any of them for your special alone-time. That way she won't freak out that she's sharing, and your short-term special friends won't care (and if they do they can be the ones buying new toys for every hookup).

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  30. this precise toy, from that precise minne store, was my first shared toy ever. i bought it with a short-lived gf in college, along with my first harness. when we inevitably broke up a few months later, she gave the toys to me with the caveat that i never use them with anyone else. thereby leaving me with the dilemma of what the hell to do with them! so i dutifully hauled them about for a year or so. i couldn't bring myself to throw them away (so expensive!), but i'd promised not to share with others. one friend suggested i write her name and the dates of our relationship in permanent marker -- a trophy of sorts, i guess. one suggested i send her a check for her half of the cost, effectively buying her out and thus eliminating her sway on the usage. in the end, i moved on, got over my guilt and the sanctity of that promise, and slutted it up. it actually doesn't see the light of day much anymore, as it's lost its favored position to two other guyguys. (http://mytulip.com/dildos/Vamp-Silicone-talula-softskin-dildo/detail in particular!)

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  31. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  32. Sapphist said...
    Monogamous long term couple right over here. In fact we celebrated 11 years yesterday. 11 years together, 8 years married. Yay us!!!

    We have 2 toys. Evingston a big beautiful shimmery purple D we bought in the beginning during a trip to Evanston Wyoming to the gigantic adult toy superstore and Ecstasy a shimmery mint green slim and feminine D we bought on a trip to a Portland exclusively women's toy store (it is good sometimes to get out of Utah). My favorite toy by far? the metaphysical dildo my wife summons up, created out of intention and passion. Never mind the safety, I would be SO sad if she shared any of these with anyone else. I've never even wanted to be with someone else not even in the privacy of my own head.

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  33. As a monogamous couple as well, my partner and I share our toys in all ways: cost, responsibility, use, etc.

    We would never be okay with either of us using them with other people. This may be biased because that would also bring in a cheating issue.

    If we were to separate, I believe we would have a custody battle for toys.

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  34. When it comes to relationships - always a new toy and only that one with that person. Random hookups? No. Sterilized grab bag as far as I'm concerned.

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  35. The thing about relationships where the primary partners *allow* for play outside the relationship, EVERY LITTLE DETAIL needs to be fleshed out, like bullet pointed list style. Seriously.Make a list. Leave no question unasked or unanswered, and, as you put the agreement into question, ASK before proceeding if there is even a twinge of doubt about anything. Assume nothing. Because remember what they say about the word "assume": It makes an ASS out of U and ME. It is very true, especially in situations like this one.

    As for toys? Condoms, always. No exceptions.I do not wish to repeat my STD infections(don't worry it was stuff I could get rid of). But no, I don't throw them out, especially with random hook ups.

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  36. CJ is right. Me and my girlfriend are in an open relationship and one of our rules is Our toys are our toys. Anything we use with eachother can't be used with anyone else. But anything that we don't use with eachother is free game.

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  37. I stopped sharing toys after I realized no one would ever wield it the same way as my fav gal. It gets to be a bit of a mindfuck. I mean, you feel a certain feel down there, and its not the same person, but you feel like it should be. I have definitely made the mistake of imagining it -was- the same person, which can get awkward for the other lady if it goes too far (which it did once...it was almost like she had too much power and didn't know what to do with it, and I subbed out and couldn't help her...it was BAD)

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  38. I totally understand toy exclusivity, and I side with CJ mostly here, but if someone told me to throw away my favorite $90 dildo I would laugh in their face and then smack them with it. Toys don't grow on trees!

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  39. As a straight girl who never owned any sex toys (until I was recently gifted one!), I came up with this same dilemma a couple years ago about lingerie! I had these cute little outfits that I loved from one relationship I had been in, but when we broke up, I didn't know whether it would be appropriate to keep them and wear them with the next guy. On the one hand, they were MINE, and I liked them, and I had spent my own money on them. On the other, I felt like my new boyfriend wouldn't like knowing that another guy had seen me and romped me in them. I ended up getting rid of them. I never asked whether he would have cared, but I side with CJ on this from an emotional perspective. I think sharing something intimate like lingerie or a toy attaches certain feelings toward it. It's not exactly the same, but as a straight girl I would equate it with how I'd feel if a a guy wanted me to wear his ex's lingerie. =(

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  40. Personally, I think you were totally entitled to keep it! I let my gf use toys on me she used on her ex. To me, it's HER dick, and she can do whatever with it as long as it's safe and clean etc.

    And to the anonymous poster, my gf and I are monogamous too : )

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  41. GlitterDick is a funny word.

    I side with CJ on this one, but did you really have to throw it away? I'm not sure what else you could have done with it, but that just seems so tragic.

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  42. I'm with the folks that think you should have kept GD for the extracurricular activities and purchased a shiny new toy with CJ for in-house use. These things don't grow on trees. Thankfully, or I'd be living in said trees.

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  43. My ex tried to recycle a strap on with me. She was a 3rd year medical student and assured me it was clean but I could never get past the fact that it had been used between her and someone else. It's got a double standard comparing it to a real life penis because these are objects that can be purchased or replaced whereas guys are born with their stuff for life. I would much rather start fresh in each relationship because I personally can't ever get past the mind fuck of a recycled toy

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  44. realist in me says: you should have kept it. sentimentalist in me says: you did the right thing to throw it out because if your love is upset, your upset.

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  45. it is your toy. you didn't buy it together. you should be able to do with it as you please. I don't care that my ex used the toy that we bought together on other people. I was happy for the pleasure that I knew those people were getting! also, i agree with the anon guy. they don't have removable dicks for each girl they bang. as long as whoever is fucking me cleans their toys and uses a condom I don't care who else it has been used on.

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  46. Sapphist got it right there. The issue for CJ is that you used something she considered collectively yours as a couple with other people. It would be like bringing others into your home and sleeping with them in your bed. I would never dream of bringing a fling home to my bed; it's OUR bed and no matter how many times the sheets were washed it would still feel like a violation of the trust I have with my partner.

    Personally I don't share toys with others because I am in a monogamous relationship. I like the idea of "home" and "away" toys, though. And don't be too hard on yourself. Tell you what, why don't you and CJ go out and buy a brand-spankin'-new GD, just for the two of you? :D

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  47. We totally have this one. We haven't even used it. I'll fed ex it.

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  48. hold on! this doesn't make any sense to me. unless you guys had previously agreed on a policy about who this toy could be used on, i don't see how you did anything wrong.

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  49. I work at one of those awesome-feminist-owned-woman-run blah blah blah awesome stores. It is the best job ever, but I also get paid in sex toys. My boss will often have me select things to try them out, and report back. As a result, I have acquired quite the collection. My monogamous partner and I use these toys, and they are a part of our sex lives that carry a lot of importance. They are personal extensions of our kink filled gender fucking sex loving relationship.
    Some really good friends of ours really wanted to start using toys but did not have the money and did not yet know if toys were for them, so my partner and I talked about it and picked out a few things that we would be willing to share (keeping safe sex in mind). It worked out great, but that was because of communication.
    I suggest talking to CJ about how she would like you to use toys with others. Maybe make a traveling "tool kit" for slut adventures! (see also, sex toy utility belt).
    You could also buy a new glitterdick and give it a new name together.
    good luck, and remember, communicate.

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  50. I cannot locate Glitter Dick on the site! Someone

    Oh, and I'm siding with you, Krista. From a logical stand point, of course. GD being thrown away is like throwing away your arms, man! YOUR ARMS! But then again, I totally side with CJ from an emotional stand point. One of those arms belonged to CJ, and you didn't read the fine print when you signed the slutploitation line!

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  51. @mo'homo: Are you sure that the sex toy recycling place is legit? It seems like a great idea, but they don't even have an address to send to, an email posted or a catalog of the supposed toys that they make...

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  52. I do share toys, and I didn't get rid of my toys after I broke up with my partner. But we were monogamous and didn't use protection with our toys. I've been tested since we broke up, and now I use condoms on all my toys with my partners. The only exception to that rule is my glass dildo, which is non-porous. I wash it after every use, and I don't use it on a partner then myself without washing it in between.

    I get how couples and even individuals can form attachments to toys. I don't have strong feelings though, and I can't afford to replace my massive toy collection every time I use something on someone. I practice safety, but past that, anything goes.

    I will tell you, reviewing sex toys online is one of the best gigs I've ever gotten. Free sex toys? Every freaking month? Um. Hell yes. That's the cheapest way I've found to build a collection :)

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  53. I should say right up front that the reason I read this blog is less about identifying, and more about wanting to understand and educate myself so that I don't sound like a dumbass. I hope that's ok, because what it means is that you guys get to endure (and hopefully correct) my dumbass questions.

    So my question is... isn't it odd to be so possessive over a toy and not over you? Don't you mean more than Glitterdick?

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  54. In my opinion, toys, especially the silicone ones, are designed for sharing. And provided it is being done in a safe & hygienic manner, then there is no issue for me.

    RIP Glitterdick.

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  55. I have one sexah times toy, a vibrator specifically made for clit stimulation. Seriously, that's all that's needed, that thing will make you see the universe. I'd only feel comfortable using it on a long time partner, that's just me though.

    I say save up your pennies and buy two glitterdicks. One for you and CJ, another one for the road. Maybe get them in different glittery colors? Buy them special shiny bags of different hues so they're easily told apart? Either way, toys for you and the wifey, a toy for your adventures.

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  56. Personally, I only own one vibrator and one double-ender. The first has only been used alone and the latter only with one other person. This is not because I feel there are emotional rules and whatnot, only because I've never had the chance. On the other hand, I used to have a special friend who I sometimes had casual interactions with and she had plenty of toys. I know she "got around" as much as I did and I'm damn sure she didn't buy a new toy for every partner. Condoms and appropriate washing are completely acceptable.
    Now, if I had a toy I purchased for a certain relationship, and she and I decided it was "ours" then, sure, I would keep separate groups of toys. I long for a harness set, but until I have someone I know I can use it with on a regular basis, no way am I going to fork over the cash.

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  57. Ain't no juju on my toys! Though maybe that's because we aren't lesbians. Just big ol' slutbags. I don't even boil most of the times, I just wash all my beautiful, expensive, all silicone, small-business-, vag-, queer- and woman-positive toys.
    I just bought a harness, however, and it's beautiful and red and llleeeeeather, my friends, and that fucker (no pun intended) is MINE. No sharesies, this has my juju allllll over it.

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  58. Dyke haircut: FRIEND!!!!! After a week of getting awful conservative haircut after another from fancy places, etc, I gave my housemate scissors, clippers and said "pretend you are 11, a little angry at being called a girl and I'm Barbie - go for it!" She did a great job and people compliment it everyday for it (and it was free and the maintenance is cheap)
    I recently told an ex I was going to go back to having a full head of normal hair to which her first response was "oh, really? How are you gonna pick up ladies? Without that hair, you just look so straight!"

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  59. i agree with a lot of people here. get "home" and "away" toys. Is it a tragedy that my girl wont let me use any toys?

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  60. This is the saddest story ever. But it does seem like the only option.

    My ex and I broke up and I kept all the toys. She'd even named a few of them... I use them. Only alone though...

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  61. best.post.ever.

    the no-no trunk? i think i actually guffawed.

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  62. I bought my harness and beautiful purple dildo, named Commodore Norrington because he was a dick in the movie. (I crack myself up.) If I had a dick of my own, its what I would want it to look like :') Aaaanywho, I bought it for the express use of my ex and I, but after our relationship exploded in flames, Commodore Norrington and the harness were integrated almost seamlessly into my new relationship.
    What I've found made it work, and why my partner and I have managed to stay together so long, is that there's 100% transparency. Alex knows where Commodore Norrington has been, and gotten over it. That being said, we have toys of our own, but that's cos we're kinky perverts and I can't control myself on online sex shops.
    I have a lot of toys, but I set aside some funds to keep us happy in the bedroom. And I love to be surprised. Nothing better than, "So, guess what came in the mail today? ...Wanna try it out?"
    I guess if we broke up, whoever bought the toy would get to keep it. I hope that doesn't happen though. We have quite the arsenal together.

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  63. Renew reuse recycle!!!! Just keeping it Green...or ummm just keepin it. Cone how often do you actually find the PERFECT dildo.

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  64. My (transman) partner and I have a harness and dildo that I think we both think of as just for us, but I'd be open to negotiation. We haven't talked about it but it doesn't matter because if he went ahead and did use it on someone else without asking, I wouldn't really care as long as he was being safe with it. We also enjoy using a really nice vibrator of mine that just happened to be a gift to me from my first ex-boyfriend. I think that juju stuff is crap.
    For what it's worth, I think if CJ cares about you using your dildo on other people, that's fine, but if she hasn't already come out and said so explicitly then it's half her own fault. You both assumed the other felt a certain way but no one asked, so the responsibility is shared.

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  65. I don't think the real problem is that you used the dildo on other people. I think it's that you *compared CJ to the other lovers.* while lying in bed with her. Even if it was meant to be a compliment; I bet all she is hearing in her head is the comparison.

    That said, to paraphrase Brandy "The-toy-is-miiiine!" i wouldn't feel too "awful and irresponsible" about it, as it sounds like it's a shared responsibility to talk all this stuff through ahead of time.

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  66. I'd say that toys only stay inside the relationship if that's agreed upon form the start, otherwise it's, as you say, YOUR toy that you SHARE with someone. If no agreement is made, the toy goes where the owner and her partners wants it, of course with all safer sex precautions.

    Your story reminds of when my semi-long distance ex threw all the toys that were at her place (being quite a bit of my collection given the distance and my reluctance to share their existence with the border control every now and then) in the trash after quite a while of fighting to keep things going.

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  67. my rules:

    1) sharing is FINE (condom - always)

    2) if the relationship ends its up to you to decide what to do with the toys. i'd keep them.

    3) Girls that sleep around a lot should consider buying a new toy if they find themselves in a commited relationship. it can symbolize a fresh start. if the new partner demands a new toy, she should help pay for it - so it officially becomes their toy.

    extra - dildo fish bowl http://shop.gessato.com/to-play-c-19/fish-bowl-by-matteo-cibic-p-385

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  68. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  69. I'm fairly certain that I'm a disgusting pig, but quality toys are expensive, and proper cleansing and use is totally adequate for safety concerns. I have not pitched them all out, but my wife will only use OUR juju-enhanced toys - REALLY too bad (bitter tear. R.I.P., Pi - site of our first date.

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  70. Although it isn't the same kind of wonderful store GD came from, you can get a freakin' ton of free toys and things from www.edenfantasys.com if you have spare time to spend on there. I've been on for 4 months and I've earned over $500 worth of stuff totally for free. I'm guessing you already know about coz I'm pretty sure EdenCafe or such featured one of your posts and that's how I found this wondrous blog in the first place, but just throwing it out there. There's no way in hell I'd be able to afford all my glorious sex toys if it weren't for EF.

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  71. Always, always, always, ALWAYS leave the toys from a failed relationship behind when you start a new one.

    My partner initially wanted to bring along her dildo and harness, but she couldn't really figure out a way to tell the ex to send it her way, and I was new to the game and didn't really know the etiquette, but I knew that every time I thought about a toy from their relationship being inside me, I became sick. So we bought ourselves new ones.

    We've been together three years now, and it JUST occurred to us that we need to get ourselves a vibrator for our sexytimes. The vibrator she has was hers, but her and the ex used it, so again, it's not coming near me. You're right, it's bad lesbian juju. So, we went to our neighborhood store and picked out a new one this week.

    Toys are expensive, but saving your relationship is more important than money.

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  72. ...this is how crushed I felt when I realized my favorite had left with the ex...(of over 9 years) and then I was just pissed when I realized that meant she was using it with her new g/f (a mutual friend) - I wish I'd had the chance to throw it out after that! :-P

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  73. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  74. Excellent choice of pictures this week, I must say ;)

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  75. First of all, safe sex always. And I understand about emotional connections to toys, past relationships, etc. If you buy a toy together, or have an understanding about exclusivity, you should honor that.

    That said, I don't agree with CJ. Assumptions were made on both sides, so you're not at fault at all. You didn't buy it together, you brought it into the relationship. It would've been nice if it occurred to you both to discuss such things in detail, but mistakes happen and I'm sure that avenue of communication is one that will stay well-traveled in the future. *g*

    Why throw away a perfectly good toy if it's safe to use? They're very expensive, as you've noted, and it's wasteful to do so. (Recycling is a grand idea, but personally I don't think I could use a recycled dildo myself. It's different when I know who the owner is. But for those that are okay with it, more power to them!)

    It's wisest to leave the toy out of the equation mentally and emotionally. It's just a tool to bring you pleasure. What counts is the lover you're with, your passion and connection to her/him. Don't get hung up in the unimportant stuff...it takes enough energy to mind the important stuff. Truly. :)

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  76. I'm with CJ on this one. I like exclusive toys. It's peace of mind. And dildos are an extension of whatever hot fuckery I share with my girlfriend. If we were to open our relationship, we wouldn't be using the toys we use with each other. That would feel like bringing a piece of my gf into bed with someone else.

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  77. This article was so depressing, yet hilarious as always.
    Can I just say that I think that this is the first time you've stayed completely fixated on one issue for the whole article? This must have been a seriously upsetting time for you.. :(
    R.I.P. GD

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  78. I'm in a monogamous relationship, but I would never use an old toy - no matter how good - on a new girl. Get new toys together. It's fun shopping with your partner!

    For this sitch, I think maybe you and CJ should get a toy - or many, many toys - exclusively for you two. Aaand you should have a toy (or toys) for your other rendezvous. Problem solved! Oh yeah, and still be just as safe.

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  79. It sounds to me like the Real Issue here is about defining boundaries. It seems highly upsetting to me that the fact that debated rights to a wonderful dildo resulted in the disposal of that dildo. That's both wasteful and unnecessay - you could have chosen to stop using the dildo with CJ (since she no longer felt comfortable with it), thereby respecting her boundaries. Or, since it seems like safety wasn't really the issue, but rather ownership and, as you put it, juju, one would hope that talking out the problem would get rid of the bad juju. I don't think CJ was right to ask that you dispose of the toy, especially since she hadn't made her wishes clear with regards to her attachment to your toy. Had she asked you to refrain from sharing that dildo with the world, things might be different. What you are facing is a basic misunderstanding, not a crisis, and certainly not a reason to increase the vast amounts of waste our landfills currently contain, especially not with a treasured toy.

    That said, it's sweet that you honor her wishes (once you know what they are), and you couldn't have read her mind any more than she read yours. Way to communicate through a misunderstanding respectfully.

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  80. Am I the only lesbian in this world that doesn't name her toys??
    My partner and her ex named their toys, which my partner and I now use together, and it's weird to me... to call them by names or whatever.
    In fact, this past weekend, I confided and let her know that it makes me insecure sometimes to use the toys on her because I feel like her ex learned how to use the toys on her, and now I never measure up. Insecure and crazy? Maybe, but now we are going to go toy shopping together. YAY!

    For us, there is a definite line between US toys and toys we'd use on hook ups. If she used one of our toys in a random hookup, I'd feel the same way as CJ.

    But I think you're a really wonderful partner for throwing it out. Supportive, no matter the cost! (literally)

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  81. I totally agree with "Anonymous" above Abbey. I wouldn't have thrown it away. I simply would not have used it with my significant other, but kept it for my private play. As for the naming of toys, my partner and I had one we named "Jellybird". Don't ask. :)

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  82. I already posted above, but something somewhat related has come up so I'd like to seek the advice of y'all mo's who have oh so much more experience than me.

    Soooo I'm hard crushing on a girl but she mentioned once that she's currently in a relationship (she used currently, not me). We haven't had much communication but it seems like she's actually really interested in me, despite the afore mentioned gf. I don't know if they have an open relationship or what, but honestly I don't want to get involved or break some girls heart (even if I don't know her, I would never want someone to feel that, especially because of me).

    But on the other hand, I REALLY LIKE THIS GIRL. I can't say her name without smiling. I get giddy, literally, when she texts. I was high for two days off the smile on her face when I asked her out. She wants to hang out when I'm back in town and invited me to a party. What do I do???

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  83. urgh you guys, you make me feel like a loser for being in a relationshio with JUST ONE PERSON for 5 years. i didnt get the memo about slutty becoming cool. where has the monogamy gone?

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  84. ok. i said slutty because i;m just jelouse. i take it back. humph.

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  85. And I left this part out of my previous response: If we bought toys together, those are OURS. If its something I got on my own, that is MINE. Those that fall into the "ours" category get thrown out if/when we split. Those that are MINE? I can use with whomever I'd like, because they are well, MINE, lesbian juju be damned.

    And to Ashley M- be this girl's friend first. If she is in a relationship, even an open one, she already has a primary partner. Don't go getting your heart broken. Figure out what her relationship situation is, what kind of agreement she has with her primary partner, and, above all, remember that are ARE NOT the primary partner, and likely never will be.

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  86. I'm not gonna lie, I cried at the end of this. RiP Glitterdick.

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  87. 1) I HAVE GLITTERDICK AND LOVE HER VERY MUCH
    2) fuck no, that shit is expensive and i have formed an emotional connection to it. it is MY penis and if i were a dude, i wouldn't have to get rid of it. at the end of the day, when you accept, really accept, that your partner sleeps with other people, that means all of their bits are not exclusively yours. CJ has a right to draw her own boundaries, and you are a good girlfriend for trying to make her feel protected and respected, but i would have been blindsighted by that as well. something that big for her should have been explicitly stated to you from the start. i mean, you aren't expected to swap out your tits or your vag so...

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  88. Owh Krista! Maybe you can save up and buy a new one exactly the same, and keep this one just for you and CJ.

    I don't really get why it had to go in the bin... I think that using it just for you or for you and your not-CJ girls would have been better, 'cause that's so wasteful and it sounds like you're genuinely sad. :( I turn 18 in 2 weeks and I want one, but my mother would NOT approve if she found it, and she tends to rifle. For me, they're the holy grail. Much to valuable to throw out.
    I'm more on your side than CJ's to be honest... You won it, fair and square. You should be able to do what you like with it. If I were CJ I'd have been pissed if I just found out you used it with other women, but I think it'd be on a... bonding with the dildo, and you, over its use thing. Like, I'd assume that the happy times we shared with it were special and that other women using it would... pollute the sanctity of those memories. But whilst I'd be upset, I'd totally get that it was YOURS and I should have made a point to ask myself if I was unsure. :/

    BUY A NEW GLITTERDICK! And keep it just for hookups, or just for CJ. Either way, you get to use it still. ;) My best friend promised me a dildo for my birthday and I can't wait. Now I just gotta find a hiding place for it.

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  89. YOU did not give sex-positivity a bad name. CJ did. She sprang a rule on you after the fact. It was your toy. If she wanted to lay special claim to it, she had the responsibility to communicate that. Freaking out on someone for breaking a rule that has never been expressed is not ok in open relationships. "You should have known because it's obvious" is the standard justification, but a lot of the time (like in your situation) it isn't. Some people are totally cool with a person using her own toys whenever. Some people feel strongly that the toy goes with the relationship. But if that's something you feel really strongly about, you need to tell the person you're dating before they go and do something that they had no reason to believe wasn't ok and then get screamed at. What CJ did is not cool. She was not right. And frankly, if she felt that stongly about it but didn't bother to tell you until after the fact, an appropriate solution vis a vis Glitterdick would have been to make a rule that you could never use it with CJ again, not never use it again at all.

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  90. CJ's objection is silly on several levels (among them: "My lover fucks lots of strangers? meh. This piece of silicon was used? GRRR!!!!") But emotionalisms are, by definition, not sensible. CJ could quite reasonably put forth: "I don't feel right about using this toy you've used with others. Not at all."

    Or maybe she couldn't... because of course, she didn't. What she *did* was complete bullshit. She retroactively and angrily cast blame about her objection. Exactly the kind of bullshit that supports the stereotype of women as walking land-mines, just waiting to explode without warning on whoever about whatever. CJ made herself into a TV sitcom trope.

    So while I disagree with CJ's objection, I disdain only her puerile behavior.

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  91. is it too late? has the trash been taken out? you could SELL that thing on eBay. for sure! At least then you'd know it's still giving pleasure to dykes out there, somewhere.

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  92. For me, I have two sets of toys, one I use in the dungeon (for work or parties) and one for my bedroom. My dungeon set is a lot bigger, but gets used on anyone anywhere, particularly a lot of boys asses. I do scrupulous cleaning, and use condoms.

    My personal set is also pretty extensive, only used on girls, but it is my set, so I use it on anyone who makes it to my bedroom. However, my darlin' has her own set, and I don't use that except on her. We'd have to dedicate a dildo as "ours" before it became exclusive to our use.

    I'm very scrupulous with all my cleaning, and my own collection leans to well-made dyke dildos, (including a glitterdick and a nice purple swirly one_) plus some really big ones that are more commercial (the Japanese-cartoon dildos).

    Personally, rather than throw glitterdick away, I would have assigned it as a general dildo, to be used on others, not on my partner, and bought a new one to be "ours".

    Synna

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  93. Oh, and no, I don't think you give sex+ve a bad name.

    I think you listen to CJ, and take her views into account. That's good. You threw out glitterdick because you promised. That's being true to your word. But CJ shouldn't have expected you to know what was in her mind/heart about your dick.

    So, get a new glitterdick for slutting about, and go shopping with CJ for some "our" dildos.

    Synna

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  94. I think you & CJ were both unwise for *assuming* that you knew each other's feelings on this subject, but I agree with your original thought process. It's YOUR toy, as long as you're practicing safe usage and cleaning, other people don't really have the right to make a claim on YOUR toy.
    But since there's now precedent that she considers any toy y'all use together a toy that is to be used exclusively between the two of you, I suggest (as others have) to go shopping and pick out a dildo that will be exclusively with CJ and a dildo that is used for people who aren't CJ.

    RIP GlitterDick

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  95. This is why I have never bought a toy to use with a partner!

    I am too sentimental and commitment-phobic. I know I would never be able to use the toy after I ended things with someone, but I also am always operating under the assumption that things could end at any moment, and nice/sanitary toys are just too much of an investment.

    ...but I've been with my current gf for over a year now (and I like to keep things monogamous), so I could have gotten in tons of use by now if I had invested early! Go figure...

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  96. To the lesbians above ^^

    My gf and I are monogamous lesbians--

    1) I'm not good at sharing
    and
    2) I've watched one too many lesbian movies where non-monogamy ends horribly.

    We're happier this way lol, it works for us
    (and power to you all for figuring out your path)


    This was an interesting post... you should start searching the internet for a new glitter-dildo

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  97. OMG, the first time I heard about sex toys specific to partners was when a GUY broke up with me. He bought me a beautiful dildo and harness for pegging purposes--then he dumped me. So I asked for my toys back and he actually replied, "It was a gift for us and now it must be destroyed." Destroyed? I was just so pissed that he meanly dumped me and on top of that he kept my cock! Years later I realized how gay that was, and honestly, how gay I am. LOL. I'm still wondering how he "destroyed" it.

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  98. My first thought was, Has it really been just 3 years since Pi closed? It seems like much longer.

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  99. Why wouldn't you keep Glitterdick and just get a new toy to use for CJ?
    It is a trusted tried and true perfectly good toy you shouldn't waste it!!

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  100. oh and I think the real lesson here is never bring up sexy times with another person while having any sort of sexy times or trying to have sexy times with a partner.

    It will not end well.

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  101. Aaah, well, I'd get a new dildo for the harness.
    But the harness. Fucking. Stays.
    ALWAYS.
    :) The ex forgot it when she moved out, I got a new dong (in my skin tone!) and set out into the big wide world.

    But I don't use toys with girls the first night.

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  102. There is an old Dan Savage column referencing lesbian sex toy etiquette and how toys absorb lesbian lover's "energy" and must be discarded with relationships-- I 110% agreed with Dan's view that this is "dyke-ass mumbo jumbo." (1) Shit's expensive! (2) This feeds into the whole stereotype of insecure/jealous/possessive dykes holding their girlfriends hostage to all their batshit and irrational feeeeelinggssss. Not a healthy stereotype to feed. Keep the toys, be clean and safe. End of story.

    [http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Content?oid=511122&show=comments&sort=desc&display=]

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  103. Let's be honest, Krista, you were Edward and your lovers were Bella.

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  104. So...what about traveling with sex toys? Like, long-term travel? I've got a post about it, and I'd love some thoughts/stories/feedback: flybydyke.blogspot.com

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  105. My girlfriend and I have one dildo that is not to be shared with anyone else while we are in a relationship. There are other dildos that can go round, but not the special one we chose together. Since I bought it, it will be mine to use with others if we part ways. It's somewhat of a different situation than glitter dick since we chose it together. It can be hard to find a dildo that two very different women will like in and on them. We each have other dildos that we personally like, but wouldn't be able to share in the same way.

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  106. Inexperienced, recently out here. How common is it to use toys? Is it a significantly better experience?

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  107. Monogamy - is FUCKING AWESOME :) I highly recommend it. 5 years now, me & my wifey are happily married lesbians :)

    Toys - are really not necessary, but can be fun with the right partner. We have alot of toys but hardly ever use them.
    I might add here...toys do add a fun element to 'genderfuck' and roleplaying scenarios, when/if you're into that... ;)

    On the passing of your toy -- sad.
    But, I agree with CJ though, and think you should have been totally honest with her.
    Diseases are scary, (and stay with you for life) An open relationship shouldn't have secrets....

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  108. aww , the ending is sad...
    goodbye glitterdick ..

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  109. I don't know how you and CJ's nonmonogamy works, but perhaps it works largely because you don't actually see each other sleeping with other people ie. you're not involved in the sex act itself. She's fine with 'sharing' you with other people while she's absent but not with 'sharing' you when she is there (When she feels like she has first dibs, understandably). It sounds like the sudden realisation that GD was not a primary object for you and her, but an object experienced with other people, made her feel like she was not getting the 'first dibs' experience she'd come to expect?

    Basically, what I'm saying is that much like others have said nonmonogamy is constantly negotiated in people's heads and that finding out that you have misunderstood the boundaries (easy to do) can throw up unexpected and perhaps irrational jealousy or possessiveness which are more to do with feeling as if you aren't being told the truth than anything sexual. that's why boundaries are so important. i don't really think it's your fault that you and CJ assumed different boundaries, as they both seemed 'obvious' to you. easy mistake to make.

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  110. Krista, have you been to the Michigan Womyn's Music Festival? Aka the most lesbian thing you could ever do in your lyfe?
    They have a special area for "recycled" sex toys: toys bought in a relationship, and once its ended, sad lesbians pass on (for free!) their old toys to young, new baby dykes. Boil it and its fine! How I wish you could've participated in such a dykey event. In London there's an event called "Kinky Queer Car Boot Sale" or so where you can cheaply buy used toys and kink goods. Wish someone would do that here.
    Story time!
    Once, I was cheating on a gf, and I instructed The Other Woman to use my gf's harness and dildo on me. Biggest asshole move /or/ Play playa play! Either way that shit was LOADED.
    Story time part 2!
    After breaking up with the gf, I was in her room, and I saw the same dildo up on a shelf like a trophy, still dirty with recent use, the white crusty cum peeling off it. Instead of feeling sick I tried to figure out whose cum it was. Hers? Her new (awful) gf's? Or a third party's, which would mean she, too, was cheating (the only option that made me feel better)?
    The point is, that shit is LOADED.
    I have a beautiful red leather harness that I paid for in my current monogamous relationship. If we break up, I don't think I could reuse it, since you really can't clean leather very well. It breaks my heart to think it would end up in the trash!

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  111. I think CJ was upset because Glitterdick is so awesome, and the awesomest toys should only be used with her.

    As for other suggestions, toys you buy together tend to go unspoken as exclusive to you two. Anything you buy on your own is your decision.

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  112. I think i understand how CJ feels. My current gf had purchased a strap-on with her most recent ex and they never even used it. When we got together, it took me a while to be ok with the idea of us using it (in fact, it took me so long that we ended up buying one for ourselves in the meantime). But eventually, I got over it.

    Now, one of my exes bought me my very first vibrator as a birthday gift early on in our relationship. Three years and a nasty break up later, I couldn't take it, i had to get rid of it. And even though i went to the store and bought the exact same one, it was still different. It was something I purchased myself without her tainting it. That is where I draw the line.

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  113. The things you have discussed in this post which are supposed to be very helpful for us. Because of these wonderful information in this post the blog can be viewed again and again.

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  114. Damn you, penis! My dreams of opening a friendly sex toy shop which sells high quality, safe sex toys has been crushed. I can't believe you'd force me to only sell inferior and unsafe products, after all I've done for you!

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  115. http://store.babeland.com/dildos-silicone/rainbow-amor-dildo could replace glitterdick.

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  116. Does anyone know precisely what dildo Glitterdick was? I'm on the market for a new one, and after such a glowing review I feel the need to try my very own glitterdick - if I could only find one.

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    1. I don't think this is it, but it's close: http://mytulip.com/dildos/silicone/leon-dildo/detail

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  117. Whew! I can’t believe you won your dildo from paying Bingo. I was laughing out loud upon reading your story. Have you already thrown your favorite silver dildo? Good luck on that. Oh, and your illustrations are great!

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  118. I don't use soap and water every time if it's my primary partner and there was no breakage, I just change out condoms. If I am using it with a different partner, I use soap and water and a new condom. If there's breakage in either case, boiling is best. We totally share all of our toys with others except some fetish things...things that have been exposed to blood or go in/over the face (mostly because we can't use condoms there and they're not always silicone).

    I don't think I'd like others to use my toys in the back door, and I don't think I would want to use a dildo of mysterious origin that WASN'T made of silicone/glass/steel, but I'd have taken Glitterdick off your hands! Seems like a severe overreaction. You're more likely to get germs from a leather harness, hands, a public toilet, etc than a boiled silicone dick that has always been used with condoms.

    So I don't get it, is it about juju, the fact you simply didn't tell her, or imaginary risk levels? I'm not completely convinced you even understand her reasons.

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  119. Oh, and I can account for at least two other people who do the same soap+water+new condom thing, but they weren't using silicone dicks so that probably factored in. Might not be able to boil it.

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  120. Yeah it's as if you cut off a guy's ...well ...Cuz it been used on you o,O It belongs to you unless you bought it together...

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  121. Necro posting to this old thread... Does anybody know where this type of fabulous dildo can be purchased today? I had "Glitterdick" but the ex took it when she split! As for the original post, If CJ didn't want "GD" to be used on her anymore that's fine, but you could have just relegated it to the "everybody elses" toy pile, and simply gotten a new "just us" toy.

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